I’ve been fasting since August 1 – sort of. lol I started out really good, sticking to it, drinking only my green smoothies and holy basil tea. And then, last weekend, I fell off the wagon and I fell HARD! lol I ate Chinese food and barbecued chicken legs and guess what? Come Monday morning, I was sick as a dog! There are always consequences, always.
This fast has been about more than just refraining from eating junk food and releasing excess fat (both of which I’ve done, by the way). No, this fast has been about that word that makes us all a little uncomfortable: C H A N G E. In conjunction with the fast, I’ve also been meditating daily and just being more mindful in general. That’s a lot of change and my ego is fighting me every step of the way. It’s my ego (not my sister, who I blamed jokingly) who talked me into eating that Chinese food when I knew I didn’t want it and knew it would make me sick. I knew it and I ate it anyway. I was telling a dear friend earlier tonight, “As the fork was on its way to my mouth, I heard a voice very clearly say, ‘Why are you eating this? You don’t want it.'” And yet, I ate it anyway. My ego had won, seemingly.
I started to believe that I was not capable of changing a lifetime of poor eating habits, that meditating every day is not something for me (yeah, my ego talked me into going back to sleep a couple of mornings when I knew I would rather be meditating) and that trying to change my life at this stage in the game was next to impossible. Oh, the things the ego will convince you of – if you listen.
I was writing in my journal one morning, lamenting the struggles I was having staying on task and keeping my promises to myself. I wondered out loud (on paper, too): ‘Why can’t I stick to this?’ The answer I got made a lot of sense: ‘Because it’s working.’ Upon further reflection on that statement, it occurred to me that resistance can only be conquered by persistence.
The more resistance I encounter, the closer I am to my goal of change. Resistance can only be conquered by persistence.
So, my friends, I say unto you: Move through it! If you are led to do something that will improve your life and then feel resistance to doing that thing, DO IT anyway!! Do it! Even if you have to start over (new diet, no cursing, no negativity, whatever your big change is) even if you have to start over, start over. Take every day as ONE day. If you make it through Day 1 of the change, celebrate it. If you don’t make it through Day 1 of the change, celebrate that too, because it means it was working. Celebrate it and start over as many times as you need to.
Resistance can only be conquered by persistence.
In Peace & Persistence,